Thursday, June 9, 2011

A New Project

I ganked this from another blog because I thought it was a cool idea, it's always good to find things you're happy/positive/thankful for. Those who know me well can tell you I'm infamous for being a bit on the self-loathing side and overly critical of myself, so maybe seeing it in black and white will make me more introspective about what GOOD I have to offer. Then again maybe it's just bullshit lol, hell I don't know. At any rate, and without further adieu--A 5 posting project in which I think about the following:

Five things you love about yourself.
Five things your body can do.
Five things you're grateful for.
Five things that make you happy you're alive.
Five people who you love.

Five things I love about myself? Hmmmmm...

1) My sense of humor. A trait I undoubtedly got from my mom (and aunt Kate), and thank God because if I took any aspect of my life seriously I would've had to be admitted several times over. My sense of humor got me through the toughest times of my bad breakup with the ex and the ugliness that followed. My comedic 'nothing is ever serious' take on life has won me a lot of friends, and a reputation among them for being able to find humor in even the most critical of situations. I just like being funny, making people laugh fills me up and gives me a sense of purpose, it's just what I do. And being the fat girl for several years there, well, I had to find some way to compensate! If people are laughing with you, finding you interesting and maybe just a bit charming, there's a good chance they won't be laughing AT you.

2) My relationship with my son. I don't claim to be mother of the year material, I haven't always done everything right, and I know there are plenty of mistakes to be made in the future. But he and I have a great relationship and I can honestly say that having him made me into the responsible adult that I am today. I shudder to think what my life would be like if Connor hadn't come along--a happy little accident that changed my life and literally made me do a 180... I love him more than anything.

3) The OCD person in me, that bitch refuses to let me half ass anything. The days I wanna skip crossfit out of sheer laziness, the nights I'm dead on my feet but I do the dishes before bed anyway, the project I finished for my very last class at wright state even though I had considered totally blowing it off bc I would have still passed (which I aced incidentally), pushing myself to step up my weights and push through a tough workout when it's so hot I can't tell whether I'm crying or my effn eyeballs are sweating... all thanks to the obsessive nature that lies deep within me. I love her because she makes me better, even when I would rather settle for mediocrity!

4) I'm an excellent friend. Yeah, probably sounds a little self absorbed but damnit it's true! I'll do anything for anyone, I'm loyal to a fault, and even though it has ended up biting me in the ass a million times I've never regret being there for people when they needed me. Look out Mother Theresa... haha

5) My forgiving nature--I should qualify this by saying 'as long as the crime is against me and not someone that I care about.' If you make that mistake, well let's just say I feel sorry for you because the crazy bitch in me doesn't put up with that shit. But if someone screws me over I'm likely to forgive and forget because that's just my nature. I figure holding a grudge is a heavier burden for me than for you, and even though I lift a lot of heavy shit, I'd rather not waste my time on that kind of personal baggage. Besides, I figure in the end you have to answer to God and bad Karma for whatever ugly things you do so it isn't up to me to judge.

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